Saturday, March 28, 2009

The Anakin Connection

Dear d

I was under the impression that I was the mad guy here. A mad guy who had these strange dreams of humiliation. Of anger and hatred. Recurring dreams which I could never explain in words. But now it's complete, atleast to the point that I can put it in words. All thanks to Star Wars - Episode I - The Revenge of the Sith. I now feel everything has fallen into place.

Everytime I think about it, I see myself in Anakin Skywalker's place by the molten lava river. My limbs cut and eyes bloodshot. I hear myself shouting
I HATE YOU with all that is left of me. If only I had my hands and legs intact, I would have taken the lightsaber and slashed you open a thousand times for what you have done to me. That wasn't the end. I thought you were the one would love me unconditionally but you let me lie there wasted. You saw me as a burst of lava caught me and burnt my entire body. My hair was gone, my body was beyond repair. But I somehow survived. I survived to write all this and more. To say this to myself that while every single strand of vein in my body carries dirty blood, I will live to hate you. I never played or will play mind games or guerilla warfare. I will be patiently waiting for the day when we have a face-off.


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